I wonder what my workplace neighbors thought hearing me laughing away at my desk. I think Mark's list is much funnier than the original non-chess list. I've reproduced his list below, followed by the original non-chess list for your additional amusement. If you feel moved to add your own items to Mark's list, please e-mail them to me. I'll be putting together my APCT News Bulletin print column shortly and plan to include the complete list. Send your additions to the list to: Contact Webmaster .

You know you've had too much of the correspondence chess 90's when:

• Much of your time "studying chess" is spent downloading games to your data base.
• You have more games in your data base than you have minutes remaining of life expectancy.
• You know the ECO classification codes of your openings repertoire.
• You have more "Winning with..." books than wins.
• You can't remember where you keep your real chess pieces.
• You spend more time with a chess engine than you do with all human chess players combined.
• You no longer study certain endings because you have a CD that plays them perfectly.
• You are completely familiar with all the functions of Chess Base 7.0.
• You're taking advice from Fritz and your opponent's moves uncannily match the program's recommendations.

Here is the original non-chess list that inspired the above.

Top 15 Signs That You Have Had TOO MUCH of the 90's

• You try to enter your password on the microwave.
• You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.
• You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
• You e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he e-mails you back "What's for dinner?"
• Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.
• You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
• Your daughter just bought a CD of all the records your college roommate used to play that you most despised.
• Every commercial on television has website address at the bottom of the screen.
• You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date. And now sells for half the price you paid.
• The concept of using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase is foreign to you.
• Cleaning up the dining area means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.
• Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
• You consider 2nd day air delivery painfully slow.
• You refer to your dining room table as the flat filing cabinet.

  ....and the Number 1 sign that you've had too much of the 90's...

• You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.